Women moodswings
by summerlilies
Summary: "This... this is no longer a dream, THIS IS A FREAKING NIGHTMARE!" Guys, that time of the month has arrived, you better run for your dear lives. Drabble.


**Here, a gift to apologize to the readers of SC for the lack of updates on Smooth Criminal. Enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: **Pokemon belongs to its respectful owners.

* * *

**1.- Agency: **_PMS-ing… like a boss_

"BLACK!"

I flinched and slowly turned around, only to see Prez, stomping her way towards me. And from that very moment, I expected some serious physical, and probably emotional, damage.

She stopped a couple of feet away and glared at me with her fierce blue eyes.

"Did you make my props order already?" she asked in a firm but less angry voice.

"Y-yes prez"

"THEN WHY HAVEN'T THEY ARRIVED YET?!" Prez yelled throwing her arms in despair and turning around.

_What I got myself into…_

"I'm s-sure they'll arrive in a c-couple of minutes."

"Geez prez, calm down…" I muttered in a moment of both idiocy and boldness.

_Feeling gutty, huh?_

Well, _that._ That guts marked my doom.

She turned around, a wicked smile plastered on her face "Calm down?"

As Prez started walking towards me, I started to back away from her horrified, and it would have probably worked… if it wasn't for that damned chair that made me fall.

White grabbed me by my shirt, our noses touched, and our gazes met. I felt my cheeks heating.

"CALM DOWN!"

"I'll calm down when I get my new props!" she snarled as she shook me with all her might.

My head went back and forth, back and forth, left to right and right to left. Now I know what it feels to be a bubblehead toy.

"Get. Me. Those. **Props**." Prez growled in a dangerously low voice.

And with that she released me. After a couple of seconds of recovering my senses I sat on the floor and noticed that she was still standing a couple of feet away.

Her arms were crossed; she was pouting and tapping her feet uneasily. I stared horrified waiting for the next round to begin.

"W-what?"

"WHY WON'T YOU TAKE ME ON A DATE?" she yelled flustered.

I felt myself blush like crazy.

"W-WHAT!"

Her eyes started watering, and she averted her gaze to the floor "It's because I'm not pretty, isn't it?"

"N-no! Y-you are very pretty prez" I replied standing up and running towards her.

"T-then take me on a date!" she demanded, her face covered by her hands.

"O-okay! Let's go to the park today!"

With that she stopped hiding her face and looked at me with her moistened blue eyes. A sweet smile crossed her lips and she cupped my cheek with her hand.

I felt my heart race, beating like a drum.

"Aww, Black, you are so sweet" she purred in a sweet voice. But in less than a second her expression went emotionless and in a grim voice she said:

"I can't, I have work."

And with that she stood up, opened the door and paused at the frame "I want those props by two p.m" after it she vanished behind it. I sat there dumbstruck.

_What the…?_

And then, when I thought everything was finally over… she peeked her head through the ajar door and beamed sweetly "See you at 7 at the Unova cafe!"

Yes, my suspicions were confirmed… it was that time of the month again.

**2.- Frantic: **_You fail, you fail at love_

I stopped at Sapphire's door and knocked.

"Coming!" beamed a happy, sweet voice.

I waved it off and looked at the dress I was holding in my arms.

I wanted to save some money to buy a new super modern sewing kit. Sadly, the last of my money was spent on new costumes and special shampoos for my pokemon so now I have to '_earn it_'. Can you believe it?

So I'm making dresses to sell them to a boutique near the market, but first I need a model… you now know where I'm getting to don't you?

The door opened and Sapphire greeted me with a wide smile "RUBY!"

She plunged on me. PLUNGED ON _ME_. Do you know how much time I spent ironing this dress?

"Sapphire! Watch it, you are wrinkling the dress!"

She giggled and completely waved me off, wait, wait, _wait_…. _Giggled_? I shuddered.

"What are ya doin' here?" she said hitting 'playfully' my arm.

"Well, I wanted to see you" I replied with my best grin.

She hit my arm again giggling "Oh, _you_!"

I awkwardly laughed along with her "Oh, _me!_"

She bursted into hysterical laughter, until it reached the point it looked bizarre. Then suddenly stopped and changed her expression into a straight face "No really, why are ya here" she said in a grim voice.

I freaked out and warily backed away.

"W-would you let me in?" I asked uneasily.

In a second her mood changed again and with a smile she beamed "Of course silly!"

As I entered I felt my mouth drop to the floor. Everything, and I seriously mean _everything, _was in complete and perfect order.

No clothes on the floor, no pizza in the dresser, no juice in the carpet, and OH MY GOD! SAPPHIRE HAS A CARPET!

I crouched flabbergasted, and stroked the blue plushy carpet.

"So _soft…" _I mumbled amazed.

"Do ya like it?"

"Of course! What happened here?" I asked, both excited and amazed.

"I cleaned up my room" Sapphire said with pride puffing out her chest.

I turned around, both horrified and amazed.

"Y-you?"

"YUSH!" she beamed fist pumping in the air.

Oh. Dear. Arceus.

DON'T WAKE ME UP! I want this to last…

"Want me to model that for ya?" she asked pointing at the red dress I left on the carpet… _I left on the carpet!_ I freaked out and lifted the dress.

Wait, the carpet is clean.

I relaxed and looked at Sapphire "Y-yes… actually _yes_! I want you to!" I beamed joyous.

"Well, then give it to me"

"BUT SAPPHIRE _PLEASE_! I REALLY, REALLY NEED YOU T—" I paused and realized she just said _yes_.

"Wait, wait, wait… you said _yes?_" I asked disbelieving.

"Yeah" she replied nonchalant.

My mouth dropped to the floor.

She grabbed the dress and entered the bathroom, so I decided to express her my gratitude yelling "Thanks!"

A couple of seconds after she replied "Ya are welcome!" from the other side of the door.

After some minutes Sapphire exited the bathroom looking completely stunning and seductive. The red of her dress clashed with her slightly tanned skin and blue eyes beautifully, the long skirt dropped to the floor in a dramatically smooth way.

"You look stunning Sapphire, absolutely beautiful" I muttered.

"Really? Aww thank ya Ruby!" she replied with a big smile hitting me once again 'playfully' in the arm.

It hurt, and almost knocked me over, but I waved it off.

"I want to see myself in the mirror".

She walked towards the full body mirror, and as she stood before it her smile was slowly replaced by a frown.

I looked at her expectant, still smiling.

"Well? What do you think?" I asked her uneasy, if she hated it she would probably beat me senseless.

After a couple of seconds she twirled but still stared with a frown.

"I look fat in this" she muttered.

The statement itself threw me aback, Sapphire…_fat_? Okay, she may eat like a hungry hobo but she never gets fat, _never! _

"Sapphire, you look completely fabulous! After all, _I_ made that dress"

"I hate it" she muttered glaring at her reflection.

"Sapphire come on! You are not _fat_, otherwise you wouldn't have fitted in. You are slim, perfect for this dress" I replied in an assuring tone.

Her gaze softened and it seemed that she had accepted what I said, that until she frowned even deeper and yelled at me "SO YA ARE SAYIN' I LOOK ANOREXIC?"

I stared at her flabbergasted.

_You've got to be kidding me…_

"Oh, thanks Ruby, that makes me feel even better!"

Throwing her arms in despair she turned around and walked towards her bed, where she sat, bringing her legs close to her chest.

I walked towards Sapphire horrified.

"Oh no, no, no… Sapphire" I said in a worried and caring tone "You are wrinkling my dress!"

I made her stand up and unwrinkled it carefully. When I was done I met her gaze and realized that it probably wasn't the best I could do in a situation like this.

_Way to go dumbass…_

Sapphire was staring at me with an unbelieving expression, her mouth slightly agape and her eyebrows cocked.

"THE ONLY THING YA CARE ABOUT IS YOUR STUPID DRESS!"

She spun around and crossed her arms "MY DRESS, MY DRESS, MY STUPID _FRIGGIN'_ DRESS!" she yelled waving her arms in the air.

I slowly began to back away, but then, in less than a second she turned around, a furious and disappointed expression on her face.

She grabbed me by my shoulders and shook me violently.

"STUPID SISSY BOY!"

"Ya don't remember anything! But ya do remember that _I _exist when ya need someone to model your stupid dresses!"

With that she pushed me aside, making me fall to the floor. The second I hit the floor I started crawling towards the door.

_CRAWL, CRAWL FOR YOUR DEAR FABOLOUS LIFE RUBY!_

"AGH! I should just rip it off!"

That made me froze.

_R-rip it?_

Then, much to my dismay, a sound of cloth being ripped apart was heard at the back. My heart clenched painfully.

_OH, NO. SHE __**DIDN'T**__. _

When I turned around I saw my beautiful dress in freaking shreds on the floor. Sapphire in underwear, standing proudly on TOP OF IT.

I wanted to scream but I had no voice, it was horrifying.

Finally I ran towards her and pushed her away "OH DEAR ARCEUS!"

I took tenderly the pieces of cloth, trying to put it together back again, but it was no use, it was unfixable…

"This… this is no longer a dream, THIS IS A FREAKING _NIGHTMARE!_"

I heard Sapphire laughing maniacally at the back and lifted my gaze only to glare at her.

"_You_…"

I wobbly stood up and ran towards Sapphire, pinning her to the wall.

"YOU MONSTER _YOU_"

Sapphire was startled by this and I was still panting from all the run. Then suddenly, and to me, out of nowhere, she started blushing furiously. Then I realized she was still in underwear and I was pinning her to the wall tightly…

DON'T JUDGE ME.

So I released her and as I backed away from the startled Sapphire I couldn't avoid let this words slip out of my mouth amused "Lacy blue matching underwear? _Really?_"

"G-GET _OUT!_"

Then in the blink of an eye I was out of her room, bruised, and with the dress in my mouth.

Sapphire was _really_ weird today. And what's more weird it's that this kind of behavior repeats at least once every month. It is like a pattern or something… I wonder… what does that mean?

_Probably_

…

…

Yeah, it will pretty much remain a mystery.

**3.- Oldrival: **_My feels_

Ding.

"…"

"…"

Ding.

"…"

Ding. Ding.

DING. DING. DING. DING. DING. DING. DI-

"_What._" I spat clearly annoyed, swinging the door open.

In the exact same instant Blue -or at least I hoped it was Blue and not some fangirl- jumped on me, making me fall to the floor.

"What the?"

"OH GREEN! IT'S YOU!" she screamed in my ear, apparently sobbing.

Yeah, it was Blue. At 2 a.m in the morning.

_Two. In the. freaking. __**Morning**__._

"_Oh, really?_ Is it me? I didn't notice…"

"Green… how can you act like such a sarcastic jerk when I'm crying? Are you some kind of insensitive indifferent beast? I'M CRYING _DAMMIT_!"

This is weird. Like Red in underwear dancing 'Macarena' on a table with no music kind of weird… no, wait, that's disturbing. And, _yes_, it happened, but don't ask.

_Please_, **don't**.

"SAY SOMETHING!" Blue shouted as she shook me violently. My head hit the floor harshly and I could barely bear the forming headache. I took her wrists in my hands and got from under her.

For once I was glad I was too lazy to take my shirt off to sleep, if I didn't had it on all of this would be awkward.

I sat in front of her and held his arms tightly.

"Woman…. why on earth are you in _my house_, _crying_, and _yelling at me, _at this _ungodly_ hour? I asked in a stern voice, coldly glaring at her.

"And…" I sniffed her hair "Is that chocolate? Were you eating chocolate?"

She looked at me wide eyed, she did. I grumbled rubbing my face in my hands.

Her eyes started welling up again with tears and in an instant she started sobbing again.

"I DIDN'T EAT IT, I _DRINKED IT_…with coffee. And I really don't see the damage of it."

After some time of just staring she frowned and continued "Are you implying that I will get fat? Is that it?"

_Perfect. __**Just perfect**__._

"No. I'm not, I just want to know _why are you here_ Blue" I growled.

"I'm here because I missed you silly…" she whispered between sobs "IS THAT SO WRONG?"

I was taken aback by that, I seriously didn't know whether to be mad, confused or embarrassed.

I went with the second.

"_Why?_" I blurted out frowning.

"You'll see, I was watching this boring documental of the Antarctic because I couldn't sleep, then saw a polar bear and thought 'Oh the Antartic is cold how can he bear it?' Then I thought 'Even worse, how can I bear this?' and changed the channel."

At this rate Blue wasn't crying anymore but looking at me with a blank face. I rubbed my temples and sighed.

"Blue, what does that has to do with _anything_?" I asked clearly annoyed.

"WAIT. I haven't finished…then I changed to the music channel and the 'Macarena' song was on so I remembered that time when we were all together and Red danced on the table to- "

"YEAH. YEAH, I remember. _Please_, just get to the point …"

"Well it reminded me of you, and _Red_, but mostly _you_, and how much I make your life awesome and all of that!" She replied smirking as if nothing was wrong, and as if she wasn't crying just seconds ago.

"Aren't you lucky to have me here? You will no longer be bored!" she beamed bouncing up and down, hugging me.

"…"

Maybe if I ignore her she'll go.

"Aren't you excited?"

Or disappear.

"…"

"Greenie…" she sang sweetly.

Abducted by magical rainbow Snorlax maybe?

"GREEN!"

Dear, _god_.

I rolled my eyes and lazily glared at her. It's two in the morning; therefore my ability 'glare' is at half its power.

Dammit.

"Say something!" she demanded shaking me by the arms.

"Yay."

With that I stood up took her by the hand and walked her to the door. I struggled with her as she sat down and started trying to get out of my grip.

_What…?_

"Hey, what are you doing? HEY, I'm talking to you! GREEN. Don't even dare kicking me out! That's rude and not gentleman-like!"

_What did I do to deserve this?_

"I'm not kicking you out, I'm patiently and politely dragging you out of here"

With that I released her as we reached the doorframe. I was facing her raging blue eyes.

"So that's how you call it? Oh, _please_, don't give me that! Green Oak you don't even consider my feelings do you? What if I liked you and came all over here just to say it? HUH? You are such an insensible bastard, you seriously don't deserve anyone's love! Neither you deserve my friendship you, you jerk! I can't believe I bothered coming all the way here just to make sure you were okay and wasn't bored"

_**WHY**__?_ _Why would you do that god?_

I facepalmed.

"Blue. You live two houses away."

"STILL! What if I got raped by some drunk on the way here? Or, I tripped on some rock and broke my ankle, HUH? Just to see _you_! How can you ignore my feelings and just kick me out like some trash bag? That's not right, you know? Even if you do not, real people do have feelings. So don't be li-"

She was cut off, by me.

I couldn't bear it. I just _couldn't_. Hearing her nagging at me would be ten thousand times worse than any possible reaction to this. I couldn't just slam the door on her face as much as I wanted to, that would only make matters worse. Besides it was two in the morning, I was half asleep, I didn't think about it well.

So instead I cupped her face and _kissed_ her.

Yeah, _I did_. And I kind of wish I regretted it, but I didn't. She kissed back and even deepened the kiss. Her arms instinctively snaked around my neck.

And we didn't part until we were out of air, it was like some kind of addicting thing. I had to restrain myself from doing it again.

I had to. This… this was way too weird and confusing. I don't even know if I feel _that way. _I mean, this is _Blue_, we are talking about. She has her good and bad moments.

There was a moment of awkward silence. What could I say?

'Hey, nice kiss. I don't know if I like you that way, but how about another?'

Too Gold-like.

'So, how about you get out of my house already? I don't love you, I just kissed you so you could shut up'

Too jerk-like.

Yeah, I couldn't think of anything so instead I blurted out with a blank face "There. That's for bothering coming all the way here. Happy now?"

Her eyes grew slightly wide and with a frown she slapped me in the face.

I kind of saw that coming.

"Insensitive pervert, don't play with my feelings like that!"

And with that she finally stormed off, after watching her disappear out of my sight I closed the door with a tired sigh, rubbed my temples and sat on the couch.

_What the hell just happened?_

After some time of pondering it I just ended up convincing myself this was just a seriously sick dream. This never happened.

And neither did the 'Macarena' thing…

….

Don't.

Just. _Don't_.

4.- **Soulsilver:** _Fear my rage_

It was a normal day, I was training in the dragon's den when suddenly…

"SILVER!"

I sighed and lazily turned around. I knew who it was, Kotone, though something was different with her this time. It seemed like she couldn't see me from where she was standing. The entrance was inclined and I was at the left, so some rocks hid me.

"WHERE ARE YOU HIDING?"

What could it possibly be?

"WHEN I FIND YOU, I WILL, ah… I _will_ do something very, very awful to you!" Kotone yelled, trying to sound threatening, and failing at it.

I scoffed and yelled back slowly in a sarcastic tone "_Oh no_… what am I going to do? I made _Kotone_ mad for something I DON'T EVEN KNOW."

I heard something landed in front of me and saw Kotone in a ridiculous ninja position. It was like two meters high from where she jumped, so no, I'm not impressed.

"That's it! _FEAR_ MY RAGE SILVER" Kotone replied, more proud than she should have been. I facepalmed. She didn't get the sarcasm.

I heard her gasp and looked at her; squinting her eyes she muttered "Wait… that was sarcasm, wasn't it?"

I rolled my eyes "_No shit Sherlock_."

Kotone stuck out her tongue at me in a childish way "Fuck you Wattson."

"Whatever" I replied her in a monotone voice, walking away from her.

"Hey! Hey I'm talking to you Silver!"

I really, really shouldn't have wake up.

A little rock hit my back, but I shrugged it off and continued walking.

"SIIIIILVER" yelled Kotone, throwing me another rock, this time bigger and hiting me in the head.

I turned around and snarled at her "Damn woman, what the heck?"

"You promised we would meet in the park to go eat ice cream today." She replied pointing an accusing finger at me "But you never showed up!"

She threw her arms at her sides frustrated and whined "I waited like two hours there Silver!"

I looked at her with a poker face not daring to say a word. There was a long tense silence of us staring at each other.

Kotone started growing impatient and growled "Say something!"

"I was busy, go with Ethan"

Then I turned around and started walking off.

"Typhloson!"

My eyes widened in horror and as I turned around my gaze met the angered pokemon's one. The beast grabbed me with it's teeth by the collar of my jacket and returned me to an extremely pissed off Kotone.

"What the hell!"

I glared at her and she smirked evily "Typhloson follow Silver and make sure he goes and buys me an ice cream"

My eyes widened as I fell at the floor with a loud and painful thud "What?"

Stupid woman. Stupid typhloson….

Stupid ice cream.

The white creamy sweet was dripping, making my hand sticky. Typhloson growled threateningly from behind me, indicating me to walk faster.

When I arrived at the Dragon's Den I saw Kotone patiently waiting under a tree at the entrance. I ran towards her and handed her the sticky, dripping thing.

She grimaced and stared at the vanilla ice cream.

"There. Happy?" I mumbled.

She looked up and stared blankly at me.

"Actually not."

With that she let the ice cream fell to the floor, much to my dismay.

"What! You made me run to the ice cream shop for nothing?"

"I hate vanilla." She replied with a shrug.

Then an evil smirk crossed her lips, one that sent a chill down my spine.

She was up to no good.

"Go and bring me another ice cream." She ordered nonchalantly.

I looked at her unbelievingly; I was going to say no when I felt a rough push at my back. I turned around and looked at the growling pokemon.

I sighed and turned to Kotone "Choco chip or Wild Strawberry?"

A smug smirk crossed her lips "Surprise me."

* * *

Woooo! Four of my favorite pairings.

**Did you like it? If so...**

**_Do you guys want me to write another chapter with other four pairings? Which would they be? _**

I could write another chapter if you want me to (when I'm not busy updating for SC of course).

Please leave your comment below~!


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